I have visited a few different hospitals in the United States since I have siblings that like to keep life “interesting!” I have even had to take Mason to the Emergency Room by myself while on a camping trip. And while a missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in El Salvador I visited a hospital and got to see what a hospital in a developing country was like. Even with all of the “preparation” I received with my life experiences, it didn’t completely prepare me for the past 2 weeks here in the Philippines.

On Saturday, July 27 we visited my cousin Diana in the hospital after she gave birth to a healthy baby girl. And then 2 days later she passed away from an infection, bleeding and water in her lungs. That was on Monday, July 29…she was 30 years old.

Our cousin Diana

On Saturday, August 3, we received a phone call at 6am from a roommate of our driver saying that he is in the hospital.

It wasn’t clear why Fabian (our driver) went to the hospital and we had to ask interpreters to understand what was going on. Apparently he had a stroke (blood clot) and needed to be transferred and the hospital was waiting to be told want to do next. Fabian is married and has a 2 year old daughter and 8 month old son. He works for a driving company and was assigned to be our driver when we arrived in the Philippines 9 months ago. He worked for us 7 days a week, taking us all over the Philippines…he was like a member of our family.

Our driver Fabian

I got to the hospital and quickly realized that things are done differently here. First off, they weren’t going to let him into the “public hospital” since he didn’t have the right card or license that said he could use the hospital. Luckily his roommate was smart enough to bring Fabian’s ID badge for our condo that indicates that he works in the area. So, he got into the ER. I got to the hospital around 9am and was able to talk to a doctor there. I was told that the right side of his body is weak and that he has some kind of blockage to the left side of his brain. I asked what the next step would be, and the doctor said that his brain will start to swell and will need surgery and he needs to be in the ICU, but there are not any beds available at that hospital…he needs to be transferred. OK…lets’s transfer him, doesn’t seem that difficult. A representative from the company Fabian works for shows up at the hospital and gets things going, so I am not needed, but I wanted to make sure he got on the ambulance and got transferred. Before he can be transferred, the ambulance that will be used needs to be paid for. Then a phone call needs to be made to the “receiving hospital” to make sure there is a bed available for him. Also, he needs to be cleaned up before they transfer him…and that is a job for family members. In our case it was the job of his roommate since his wife (who stays out in the province) was on a bus trying to get to the hospital. And someone needs to buy all of the items needed to clean up the patient…his company paid for the items needed.

At noon I finally left since I really wasn’t doing anything except for watching people. I thought that he would be transferred any minute since there were 3 ambulances sitting in the parking lot. Well, at 6pm we finally got word that he was finally transferred. Not to the hospital that I was told he was going to earlier that day, but a different one. The next morning around 10am we got a phone call from Fabian’s wife asking for 80,000 pesos (about $2,000 USD) so Fabian could have surgery. We said ok without much hesitation, having just recently witnessed our cousin pass away due in part to a lack of quality health care. At this hospital it was nicer, but still odd. We were not allowed to sit inside the lobby of the hospital because Mason is 4 years old. Only 7 year olds and up are allowed inside the hospital, so the kids and I sat outside and waited for Matt to take care of things. We met Fabian’s wife and mother-in-law and Matt got more information from the doctor on the status of Fabian. After having paid the 80,000 PHP, we later found out that it was just a deposit for brain surgery to relieve swelling, and the whole bill would be 500,000 pesos (about $11,500 USD). Matt was also told that half of Fabian’s brain was already dead. If he did survive surgery (50/50 chance according to the doctor) he would likely stay comatose and never function again (and would be a perpetual financial burden on the family). This news was devastating to everyone. At that time, a decision was then made to transfer Fabian to a charity hospital where resident doctors would perform the surgery at a reduced rate. Matt was then refunded the deposit, but the charity option later fell through and the surgery was not performed. Fabian finally passed away on Tuesday, August 6, at 3pm. He was 45 years old.

We had to sit outside on these chairs because Mason was too young to go inside the hospital

On Thursday, August 8, Matt texted me and told me of a co-worker that was at the hospital, apparently he had a brain aneurysm….this co-worker was 32 years old. We received word that he passed away on Friday, August 9. We went to his wake on August 10 to give our condolences.

Co-worker Rodney in the blue shirt

Matt and I just returned from the burial of our cousin Diana. She will be at a nearby cemetery for the next 5 years. If the family wants to keep her body there, they will need to renew the spot in 2018. If they can not afford to renew, the body with be disposed of. It was heart breaking to see the children, husband and mother of our cousin Diana weep as she was finally laid to rest. These deaths have made us realize how fragile life is and how quickly loved ones can be taken from us. We need to live each day to the fullest and live in a way that will have us be prepared if/when we were called home.

Diana’s casket being put in the grave

In May while my sister was visiting us we met some cousins that moved from Siquijor and are now living in Manila (click here for the original story of our unexpected Filipino family reunion). First we met Marites (pronounced maurie-tess) and her boyfriend, Jay, at the mall. She also contacted her sister, Diana, and got her to come as well to meet us and bring her two kids, Christian age 13 and Dana age 12. We noticed that Diana was pregnant and found out that she would be giving birth around August.

First time meeting cousins, so we treated them to dinner at the mall.

A couple of months passed and we knew that it was getting close to the time that Diana would be giving birth. Then, this past weekend Marites texted us saying that Diana gave birth to a baby girl on Friday, July 26, but Diana had some kind of infection and was bleeding. We were asked if we could help since she needs some blood and medicine. Matt and I went to the hospital and entered the ICU. With my siblings and all the craziness that they do, I have seen my fair share of ICUs at hospitals…but this was NOT an ICU in America, Diana was in the “charity ward” of UERM Medical Center. Charity wards do not have the same level of care as the rest of the hospital. The ICU was a room about 20’x20′ and had 3 patients in that small area. Diana was swollen with tubes in her mouth and a scared look in her eyes. She wouldn’t let go of her husband’s hand while we were there. The doctors/nurses finally said that there were too many people in the room and that only one person at a time could be in there.

Front part of the UERM hospital

What it looks like behind the hospital

So, we left Diana and her husband to go look at the baby. This hospital is about 4 stories and the ICU was on the 4th floor and the “nursery” was on the 2nd floor. No elevators were seen and the hospital looked like it could have doubled for a WWII prison. We didn’t have to check-in as visitors, and everything was in Tagalog…good thing our relatives know some English. So we enter a small closet area to look into what we think is the nursery. But, it must have been the NICU. I have never seen such small babies in person before. Baby legs about as big as my thumb and 3-4 incubators with newborn/preemies inside. It took awhile and some talking to a nurse, but she brought over a 7 pound baby girl to show us. So that was so nice to see a “healthy” baby.

NICU or Nursery or both?

Healthy baby girl weighed 7 lbs. 2 oz.

We left the hospital and gave our cousin Marites some money to pay for bags of blood and medicine for Diana. Marites broke down in tears and just hugged me so tight. This money was going to make things better! That was Saturday. On Sunday night we get a text message from Marites saying, “L0rd God plz help my sister diane 2 survive.” We responded that we would pray for her…not much more we can do late at night. We go to bed and in the morning receive a text that said Diana passed away.

Text message we received about Diana

We were in shock with this news. Our experience with being sick and being in the hospital means that you get better since the trained professionals are there with the equipment to make everything better. Well, that is the experience you get if you are at a “nice hospital” and have insurance, or money, or live in a 1st world country. At the very least, the doctors can help you survive a bit longer and prolong the fight. We can’t help but think that if she was in a better hospital this tragedy could have been avoided. We said that we would help with whatever we could, so we were asked to bring some food over for the vigil. I am not accustomed to Filipino vigils or death in general, but sadly our house help knows too well what is needed. We loaded our car with bags of food and drinks and took them over to Diana’s house where her body is there for people to pay their respect.

A few blocks away from our cousin’s home…very different living conditions than what we have in the Philippines.

The streets were a pretty tight fit for our car.

Diana passed away around midnight and we got to their home at roughly 6pm. The body was already in a coffin with make-up and lights and candles around the coffin for people to pay their respect. We were shocked to see how quickly things were done given the fact that Diana was still alive 18 hours ago. Diana’s body still looked swollen in the coffin and not like the person that we met back in May.

What the front area of the home now looks like and will stay like this for about 2 weeks while people pay their respect.

Our cousin Diana laid to rest

We spent about 3 hours at the house with family and friends. We got to meet Diana’s other sister (Devina), and her “common-law husband”. We also met other cousins of our cousins. It is hard for us to comprehend how Diana died so quickly at the age of 31, but her husband, children, and sisters could smile and chat with us. We assume that they are smiling on the outside, but crying on the inside. We know her son stayed up through the night in tears and hadn’t slept yet. I wish that I could take away their pain and sorrow. I take comfort in The Plan of Salvation that our Heavenly Father has for us where families can be together forever. There is possibility that I may have to speak before Diana’s burial since I am a relative; and if given the chance, I will speak and bear testimony of God’s plan, and that they can be reunited as family again in heaven.

Meeting new family members and gathering their information at Diana’s vigil

Wish we could have taken this photo of the sisters while Diana was alive…Tia with her cousins Devina and Marites.

Diana passed away 2 days before her 31st birthday

This is the way that I will remember Diana…how I saw her on our first meeting.

As soon as we came home from Perth, Australia we found out that Matt had a business trip to Singapore.  So of course we booked tickets and off to Singapore as a family we went.  I really like these business trips where Matt’s company pays for his plane ticket and hotel room, so we just have to pay for our plane tickets!  Matt flew out on Monday and had business meetings Tuesday-Thursday.  The kids and I flew to Singapore on Wednesday and did our own thing on Thursday and stayed together as a family for Friday-Sunday.

We stayed at the Fullerton Hotel and because of some connections we got a free upgrade.  We had a beautiful view from our window and the staff were all very friendly and helpful.  Singapore is truly a melting pot and it was difficult to figure out if people were Singaporean, Malaysian, Filipino, Korean, Japanese, Chinese, etc.  And it is also true that Singapore is expensive.  We probably spent a small fortune during our time there, but we made some wonderful memories!

Fullerton Hotel is were we stayed. It has an interesting past and has been around since 1928.

Day 1: Crossed the boarder into Malaysia to go to LegoLand

Day 2: S.E.A. Aquarium in Sentosa

Day 2: Universal Studios which was near the aquarium on Sentosa Island. This was the first time that Matt has been with us at an amusement park!

Day 2: When we finally left Sentosa Island we took these cable cars to get back to the mainland.

Day 2: View of Sentosa Island at night as seen from our cable car.

Day 3: Mason enjoying the science center.

Day 3: Walking around Arab Street

Day 3: At Little India doing some shopping!

Day 3: We went up to Marina Bay Sands Hotel to check out their infinity pool.

Day 3: The shoppes at Marina Bay Sands…very high end stores.

And this is Marina Bay Sands Hotel with the shops in front of it.

Day 3: Dinner at some hawker stalls.

Day 3: The kids ended the day by swimming in the pool.

Day 4: Met up with cousins that are living in Singapore and spent the day at the zoo.

Day 4: Singapore zoo has a fun water park where the kids spent over an hour.

Day 4: We walked over to the Night Safari after the zoo and spent the evening with the animals.

More photos of our Singapore vacation here.

The end of May Matt had a business trip to Perth, Australia.  So, we pulled Kalani out of school for a week and explored Western Australia.  A very generous co-worker that we actually met while our two families lived in Aberdeen, Scotland invited us to stay at his home during our week and they served as our chauffeur and tour guides.  They have a daughter Kalani’s age and a son a couple of years older than Mason.  The kids all got along well so that was nice for everyone!

It was getting to be winter time in Australia so I looked forward to wearing jeans, long sleeve shirts and not sweating.  I checked the forecast for the week and we would be leaving Manila where it was around 98’F to Perth where it was suppose to be 70’F.  However for about 24-36 hours the weather dropped from the normal 70′ F to 55′ F, but still we went out and enjoyed Australia!

Our first outing in Perth was to Burswood Park to meet up with Filipino co-workers for a BBQ.

We toured around a small section of Kings Park on this beautiful day.

Ended our first day in Perth by visiting City Beach. The kids didn’t need their swimming suits to enjoy the water!

Day 2 was spent at SciTech.

Day 3 we went to the zoo. The kangaroos roam freely in the Australian section.

Day 4 we visited the museum. This dinosaur was making some loud noises.

Day 4 was also spent walking around city center and taking the free hop on hop off buses.

Day 5 was spent at the aquarium. Mason really liked the touch pool.

Day 5 was also the coldest day we were there so we had some fabulous hot chocolate at the nearby shops in Hillary.

Day 6 we went to Caversham Wildlife Park where dreams came true of touching kangaroos and koalas.

Day 7 we toured the Fremantle Prison that was in operation until 1991.

Farley family had a wonderful week in Perth, Australia!

I took the kids out from about 10am-2pm.  Our host family’s children were in school while we were there, and their school didn’t start until about 9am.  We would come home from our day out and the kids would return from school around 3pm.  Then we spent the evening home enjoying a home cooked meal and watching movies or playing games.  The adults did go out one evening to see Perth at night while the 4 kids were being watched by a friend.  There really isn’t a whole lot more of Perth to see or do that we didn’t accomplish in the week we were there.

More photos of our Perth vacation here.

My sister is pretty incredible.  She flew from Utah to Manila (taking 4 planes each way) with her 4 year old and 1 year old while her husband was touring Asia.  The kids and I were so happy to have them come visit with us.  They stayed for 3 weeks and we got to do a lot of pampering, shopping, eating, site-seeing, reuniting, etc.  It was so much fun.  We hadn’t seen each other for 8 months and we are not sure when we will see each other again.  It was also nice to have her around while Matt was out of the country.

What we did while the Hansens were visiting us. Stuff for the kids, for the moms and for the whole family.

Sunday afternoon at the American Cemetery in Manila.

The kids and moms enjoyed a day at Santa Elena Fun Farm. We spent the day fishing, horse back riding, feeding animals, doing a zip line, riding a water buffalo/carabao pulled wagon, etc.

Matt’s co-workers treated us to a Girls Night Out at Palladium.

A friend took us to get our hair colored. I got purple and Makana got blue streaks through out our hair. We are the Fruit Loops in a Cherrio world.

The kids enjoyed a day at Ark Avilon where we were able to feed fish and crocodiles, hold birds and a python. Sadly, Jenny the orangutan was getting a physical so we didn’t get to meet her.

We spent a morning making sock puppets with young girls who have been abused.

The kids enjoyed playing at Kidzville where they could get their energy out and use their imagination.

Just the 2 of us went to Taal Volcano on a day trip.

We met 2 more cousins that are living in Manila and had dinner with them at a mall one night.

We had a long wait for a ferry boat in Dumeguete before we could take the Hansens to Siquijor. So we spent time at the mall getting massages, pedicures, eating, people watching and fish spa…I think she liked the fish eating her dead skin cells!

Now 2 of my siblings have been to Siquijor and visited our long lost relatives.

We all got into our cousin’s boat and enjoyed the beautiful scenery of Siquijor.

We picked Mckay up at the airport and headed directly to Siquijor. He was really tired and spent most of the boat ride trying to sleep.

Mckay only had 2 days in Manila with us. So we made sure he had a spa day and then we went to Pagsanjan Falls.

The kids all loved playing with each other for 3 weeks.

I loved being with my sister and showing her around the Philippines.

Not exactly sure when and where we will all be together again.  Good thing there is the internet, social media networks, facetime, telephones, etc. to stay in touch!  Thanks for coming to visit us Hansen family.